Knock, knock. Who's there?

Bloody Alf had me on elastic! I'd do whatever that hairy arsed manipulator wanted.

He used to sit by the cat flap (which is in the back door) and yodel for me open the back door. I'd give in and go and do it.

He'd sit by the front door and yodel. I'd open that.

He'd follow me round and meow whilst looking sleepy. I'd pick him up and cuddle him so he would have to go to sleep on his own. Bloody article.

My two had gotten very lazy about using their cat flap, during the summer all the doors & windows were constantly open so there was little need for them to use it and then when the good weather ended their little faces looking at me through the patio doors with pathetic mews was all that was necessary for me to jump up, open the door and let them in. As I was going to be away over Christmas and then again for a few days in the New Year I knew I had to play hard ball to make them use it so I had to ignore their pleas for me to let them in even if it was pouring with rain, it took several days of tough love, ignoring their cries, walking out of the room and rattling the cat flap and then rewarding them when they used it to re-educate them, now they only wait a few seconds at the patio doors and immediately dash round to the kitchen door!