Wales are hosting Poland in a "must win" Nations League game tonight - lose and they will be relegated like what England were. Amusingly many of their team are injured but it's interesting to note Leicester keeper Danny Ward is left on the bench. Hardly surprising given the hash he's making of his job at club level.
Better from England so far but we can't score. We have been goalless first half in all six of our previous Nations League matches. He's still playing Maguire!!
0-2 down, Mrs M goes out for a ciggie, I sit down to watch and within five minutes we're on 2-2. Mason Mount, Gareth's b/f who's been useless for 16 games scored a brilliant equaliser. And to cap it all, we win a penalty and Kane plants a fantastic ball into the top left hand corner of the net - 3-2 with ten minutes to go. Squeaky ar$e time. The Germans pressed hard, some defensive confusion and Nick Pope is left to save a shot - which the useless relegated Burnley* shyster fumbles and the ball is in the net. 3-3.
Southgate has probably survived tonight but FFS get Maguire and Pope out before the WC!
EDIT: Ex- Burnley, he's at Newcastle now, I had forgotten.
Arsenal 3-1 Spurs This is becoming a habit, another great performance from the Gunners leaves them sitting proudly at the top of the table four points clear of Man City. It's astonishing and surely the heavens shone down on the club for buying Jesus to play alongside the Angel Gabriel.
Fulham 1-4 Newcastle Blimey, the Geordies had a field day after a cheating Fulham shyster went in with his boots up near Sean Longstaff's chops and was rightly thrown off after eight minutes. And so the Toon took full advantage and Mad Mullah Eddie Howe took another wife.
West Ham 2-0 Wolves I preferred it when the bubble blowers were not blowing and David Moyes' mush looked more gaunt and haggard than ever, but now they're hauling themselves out of trouble and approaching Villa status.
Liverpool 3-3 Brighton When I tuned into my phone earlier it was 0-2 and I could hear the gnashing of Warrington teeth from Scarborough. Thankfully order was somehow restored through old boy Bobby Firmino. Poor Mo could only offer an assist, while the Scousers third came from a Seagull who dumped in the wrong net. Just a point then for Liverpool but they're only just behind Fulham now. In 9th that is.
I think this was from the Napoli embarrassment but it will do.